Naked People and Poodles?

HART TOWNSHIP, Mich. — Police say a naked 14-year-old boy taking a walk with a large white poodle has assaulted a woman in Michigan.

Sheriff’s Lt. Craig Mast says the boy walked away from a behavioral treatment facility Monday. He was strolling unclothed in Hart Township with the dog when he encountered a 53-year-old woman in her yard.

Mast says, “The young naked man approached her with this poodle, and she immediately realized something peculiar.”

They spoke briefly. When the woman took out a cell phone to call for help, the boy pushed her and fled with the phone, which he later broke in half.

Deputies found the boy. He’s charged in juvenile court with strong-arm robbery and assault.

Its Obvious that the Poodle had dominance over the boy, and ordered him to attack the woman in the story. How this came about, however, is the mystery. This could signal a new weapon being deployed by the Animal Kingdom in the fight against humanity. Stay tuned to AU2012 for more updates.

This makes perfect sense; its Poodle retribution for years of cutting poodle hair the way that we humans apparently like to do.